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Brf · Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 5:52 pm Post subject: Game-2 Roleplay

The Kingdom of Hexitonia had been ruled for forty years by the good King Dweebnick. His rule was a peaceful one, and the peasants were happy. Unfortunately, the King was such a dweeb that he never found a wife, and his parents vowed upon his birth that they could not risk having another such child. Therefore, when the King died, drowning in his bathtub, he left no heir.

The good King's cousins each vowed to take the kingdom by force.

Brf · Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 5:57 pm Post subject:

Brf the Great, the Duke of the Eastern Provinces, met with his General.

* Snake-eye, we must plot quickly. SStabler, Old Dweebnick's general, already plots to attack our lands. We must strike first and eliminate the threat to our lands.... and our people too.

s_stabeler · Joined: 20 Feb 2005 Posts: 2292

sstabeler also summons his gweneral * prepare to defend our land and rid it of all others.

Batchman · Joined: 12 Dec 2004 Posts: 1413 Location: Orlando FL

General Batch: "Men, the king is dead!"

Men: "Yeah!" "All right!" "I never did like that guy." "Hey, anybody got any beer?"

General Batch: "Now I've heard rumors that some of the other generals and lords are plotting military actions to take control of the entire country."

General Batch: "If that were all that was involved, I wouldn't worry about it too much ... but rumor has it one of them's a lawyer!"

Men: "AAUUGGHH!!"

One lone voice: "AAUUGGHH!! Me beer top is stuck!"

General Batch: "We've got to be ready to defend ourselves and our territory. We may even want to be ready to expand ... anything that will aide in protecting against the lawyer."

Men: "What about loading up with wooden stakes and garlic?"

General Batch: "While there are similarities, not all lawyers are vampires ... some are just bloodsucking leeches! I'd suggest preparing for more normal military action!"

Men: "YESSIR!"

One lone voice: "Uuurp ... uh sorry 'bout dat, I got me beer open!"

Che · Joined: 05 Dec 2004 Posts: 469 Location: Mint Julip, Texas

"Finally, that farting old wind-bag has died... I, the Duke of Earl, will be the King of Hexitonia."

s_stabeler · Joined: 20 Feb 2005 Posts: 2292

commander sstabeler: flip it looks like everyone is going to be playing in rthis game. TROOPS LET'S ATTACK A FEW PLAYERS

Brf · Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2005 6:29 pm Post subject:

* Sir Brf, we are securing the fortress towns and recruiting the able-bodied men. Our scouts report that Castle Paintball, to the South, has been taken by coup. We do not know who leads their armies.

* Good, Snake-eye. We will arm the recruits with Bill-Gisarmes and turn all the plowshares into swords.

* Oh.... One more thing. General Sstabeler, to the West, is reportedly raving about attacking Players.... The rumer is that he has outlawed chess.

s_stabeler · Joined: 20 Feb 2005 Posts: 2292

GENERAL! FWTCH ME MY WAR ARMOUR. I MUST REPEL THESE PEOPLE WHO LAY FALSE CLAIM TO MY THRONE! IT'S TIME FOR WAR. RERCRUYIT THE LOCALS.

Guest · Posted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 1:22 pm Post subject:

- Alright men! We've taken this lousy little playground which our enemies call a castle, nothing special so don't get full of yourselves! Strengthen the walls and get ready for some real action!

* The newly appointed captain of the Unknown Legions smirks while thinking of his next move

Che · Joined: 05 Dec 2004 Posts: 469 Location: Mint Julip, Texas

"Hup...Hup... Hup", the sound of Whifflers (kind of like a medieval sergeant) drilling recruits is heard from all directions.

A small group of officers are observing the evolutions of the peasant soldiers.

"I hope Duke Chebert knows what he is doing. We need more time to whip this rabble in to shape", comments a short, stout Banner-Captain.

His commander, Great-Captain Hirham replies, "Our beloved Duke will not do anything hasty."

He continues, "heheheh, did you notice how the bloody knights got their act together... after the Duke hung a couple of them."

Brf · Posted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 6:11 pm Post subject:

"Sir Brf, we have secured the Fortress Towns. There has been no resistance thus far."

"Good. Any declarations of surrender from any of my cousins?"

"Nope."

"Bother. I was hoping to avoid unneccessary bloodshed.'

Batchman · Joined: 12 Dec 2004 Posts: 1413 Location: Orlando FL

Men, we've secured our keep!

Now we'll just expand our borders until we add a couple more small villages, then we'll see where things stand!

And, no, Weinstein ... you can't open another keg! No more beer for you until you proof your worth!

Brf · Posted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 9:13 am Post subject:

"Scribe, send messages to dear Cousin Coojoe and that usurper von Lupstein that their daily Tribute levels will be one Copper per peasant and one Silver per landowner."

CooJoe · Posted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 1:32 pm Post subject:

*CooJoe reads the message from his cousin.*

"We will pay his tribute, not with Copper, or Silver, but with sharpened steel."

*CooJoe looks around.*

"Did anybody write that down?"

Baron · Joined: 04 Jan 2005 Posts: 175 Location: Washington State

~Setting: Three weeks ago, in the estate of Lord von Fourier. The Lord is sleeping on an elegent 18th-century couch.~

*Childe von Fourier runs in, a telegram in his hand.*

Childe von Fourier: "Father! Father! Mine Uncle's are deviding this Kingdom!"

*Lord von Fourier awakes.*

Lord von Fourier: "What is this, my son?"

*The Childe hands the telegram to his father.*

Childe: "Read the note, sire! Thy brothers are now deviding the kingdom as we speak. They make their move while the corpse of our Cousin, goode King Dweebnick, is still a-fresh!"

Lord: "Calm, Childe, calm. I shalt speak with Sir Brf. Nay, I shalt go to him and have a conference with all thy cousins. And order shalt prevail."

Childe: "Godspeed, my father, and my lord."

* * *

~Setting: Now. Lord von Fourier has returned from his conference. As his limousine pulls up, a crowd waits to greet him.~

*Von Fourier exits the limo, umbrella in hand. He waves to the excited crowd.*

Lord von Fourier: "My countrymen! It is a fact that through this land, all men are our countrymen, and the country has seen this. By speaking sensibly with my cousins, in conference, I have secured peace for our times!"

*The crowd breaks out into wild applause.*

Brf · Posted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 3:03 pm Post subject:

"Sir Brf, we have received news from your cousin von Fourier. He has named his horse Limosine, and has futuristic furniture!"

Che · Joined: 05 Dec 2004 Posts: 469 Location: Mint Julip, Texas

"What sayth yea to the rumors that our kinsman von Fourier is a warlock and a familiar of Satan", Duke Chebert inquired of his Bishop.

"He is said to possess strange and unholy objects, such as a bed of a type never seen before", replied the fleshy and bejeweled cleric.

Guest · Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2005 1:59 pm Post subject:

Captain Dalroen - Men, we need more supplies. Quickly saddle the horses and send out 2 bataljons to loot and burn the villages. 1 shall be sent to the north east and the other northwest.

All soldiers - Yessir!

Brf · Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2005 6:50 pm Post subject:

"Snake-eye, report!"

"Sir Brf, we have secured three of the four objective villages. In the fourth we were ambushed by two legions from that Lubstein scum. We thought they were coming to pay the requested tribute, but they cut down our men before they drew their swords."

"Lubstein will pay"

"Yes"

Che · Joined: 05 Dec 2004 Posts: 469 Location: Mint Julip, Texas

"Clerk, write down my words of thanks for General Batchman", commanded Duke Chebert.

"To my esteemed kinsman, General Batchman, you have our gratitude for quickly ending the disorder and unrest that occurred in OUR Village of Creedmore (Loc. 5:0)... upon the death of the late King."

The Duke paused to take a long draught of his wine... before continuing to speak.

"Creedmore has be part of my family's lands... for many generations. It is time for you to withdraw your lances and restore control of the village to its legitimate authority."

"Sign the usual gobblely-gook and send it with a messenger... today."

The Ducal Chancellor, Bishop Sigsward, presented the Duke with a sheet of parchment. Before the Duke could speak, the Bishop said, "Your Grace, I need your signature on this Warrant of Execution... for Smegley the Swineherder."

"If you remember, you found him guilty of bestiality during last month's Ducal Court and... "